


He Was Just There

by 1_spritzbi_2



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Other, The Karasuno Second Years are good friends, kind of implied KinoNari, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2020-08-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:14:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25895776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1_spritzbi_2/pseuds/1_spritzbi_2
Summary: Kinoshita Hisashi wasn’t lonely, he wasn’t sad. But he wasn’t popular either, and he wasn’t happy. He was just there.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	He Was Just There

Kinoshita Hisashi wasn’t lonely, he wasn’t sad. But he wasn’t popular either, and he wasn’t happy. He was just there. 

His entire life he’d just been _just there_. 

Another blip in the system for someone else’s life, a background character in his own. 

But he didn’t try and change this, I mean what was the point? He’d always been surrounded by people who were extraordinary in one way or another, they deserved the spotlight they’d been placed under, he didn’t. 

What did he even have anyway? He’d always been the most basic, average person. He wasn’t extremely smart but he wasn’t flunking either, he was average. He didn’t have any amazing skill in volleyball like Noya or Tanaka, he was just average. And in a family as big as his he’d learnt to deal with just being there. He wasn’t meant to be seen, he’d just blend in. 

So what if he had anxiety? So did most of his friends, they didn’t need to be bothered by him. So he kept quiet. 

But there were nights, very common nights if he were to be honest, where he just wanted to let it all out, all of it. All the doubts, the insecurities, the loneliness, the feeling of him not being important in his own life. He wanted to cry and scream and he wanted someone to hold him while he did. He wanted people to see his pain, to _help_ him. 

He had great friends, he really did. Noya was bright and happy and always made him smile. Tanaka was there to give encouragement and to make them smile. Ennoshita was smart and brilliant and nice, he worried for his friends and cared about them deeply. Narita was, well he was himself, he was the only person Hisashi felt close enough to tell half the things he felt, because he knew he felt the same. He was kind and funny and Hisashi really loved him (that was for another day). They were great. And he wanted so badly to reach out to them during those cold nights were it felt like everything was falling in on itself. Or during the days he felt numb to everything the world threw at him. But he didn’t. Because they had their own problems. 

But that night was different. His usually loud and busy house was quiet, he was the only one there. His mom and dad had taken his siblings to some place or other, but he’d had to stay back, school or whatever. The usually loud voices of his siblings that’d snap him out of doing something stupid weren’t there and he was more and more tempted but he had to resist he-

And he’d dialed Tanaka’s number, _god dammit Hisashi_. He’d wanted so, _so_ badly to reach out to his friends but god this wasn’t the right way. 

“Hello? Hellooo? Kino? H-“ and he hung up, anxiety clawed his throat, why did he do that? The voice of his friend was comforting but the anxiety of the situation took over before he could process it, and he hit dial on Noya‘s. 

“Hey Kino. Hello? Dude you-“ fuck. You’d have thought he’d learn. The anxiety was back and-

“God dammit!” He yelled. He just wanted so bad for someone to hug him and tell him all would be ok but he was alone, alone and miserable and a background character in everyone’s lives, someone that people didn’t know or care to know because he was just there so what was the point anyway? He wasn’t cool, he wasn’t smart, he wasn’t talented in any way shape or form. He was just Kinoshita Hisashi, nothing interesting. 

He wanted to stop feeling so numb but with a piece of sadness straight through his chest. He wanted to mean something to someone. God he just wanted it to stop. 

He used to be good at covering those feelings, ones that’d always been there he realised. The loneliness and the sadness and the uselessness. But, they’d gotten stronger, everyday he hid them they took over him more. People on the team had started to ask him what was wrong. Everytime he said it was nothing, cause it was. It was just his stupid little brain feeling sorry for itself, _nothing_. But he still saw the worry. He didn’t know why it was there I mean he was in the background all the time, him leaving wouldn’t affect anything or anyone, hell he was half convinced his parents wouldn’t notice for a week if he did go. But it was there.

His finger hovered over Ennoshita’s contact, maybe hearing his friend's voice would help snap him out of this downward spiral. 

“Hey Kino. Hello? You there Kino-“ he hung up again. Maybe he couldn’t be snapped out of this one, maybe he was stuck. If his friends could help him then maybe, 

And like that he was calling Narita. 

“Hey Hisashi. You ok it’s pretty late? Hisashi?” He hung up…

What was wrong with him? He couldn’t even call his friends, maybe he should just leave, go and never come back. Hell no one will notice anyway, maybe he should end it, leave this personal hell he created, maybe, maybe, _maybe_. 

He felt a tear slide down his face. _Pull it together Hisashi_. And another. _God dammit_. They didn’t stop. _Why wouldn’t they stop?_

Then he heard a knock at his door, odd. It was nearly midnight, why’d anyone be walking around especially to here? But apparently his common sense wasn’t working so instead he went downstairs and opened the door. 

And there stood, his friends. _Huh?_ All wearing expressions of concern. 

“Huh,” his voice was hoarse from crying, it’d definitely been longer then he thought. Then Narita stepped in, not even needing permission at this point and wrapped his arms around the other boy. Hisashi’s damn broke and he sobbed, surrounded by the warm arms of his friends, who’d joined the group hug. 

Kinoshita Hisashi was lonely, he was miserable. But he still had friends, and they’d try to make him happy. He would be ok. 

**Author's Note:**

> Idk why I wrote this the first paragraph just came to me in the middle of the night and I had to write it.
> 
> Do I project all of my emotions and insecurities onto characters I love and relate to because this is the only way I feel comfortable talking about this in a serious matter? Maybe so.
> 
> Anyway Kinoshita Hisashi, Narita Kazuhito and Ennoshita Chikara deserve more love and appreciation. Hope you liked it!


End file.
